I woke up today with a heavy heart. Actually the past nine months I have woken up with a heavy heart. But it’s a heavy heart that comes with a peace of mind. If that is even possible. It is. The peace of mind is Gods grace. I can’t give that credit to anyone else except the one who gave it to me. I know this because I’ve been really lost and in a dark place before and for the first time in my life there is this peace that is unexplainable. It is a peace I have been searching for, the peace that people will spend their entire lives trying to find when it has been right in front of them the whole time. And some may never find it. Or they may see it, refuse to believe it, and will continue this journey until death do them part. It is REAL peace. Not do yoga every morning, eat vegetables, stay in bed with coffee kind of peace, it’s the everything can be spiraling out of your control but you can face each morning and still look at the glass half full type of peace.
It has changed my entire perspective on life. Yes I’m going through a divorce, something most religious people frown upon or think I’m deserving of hell. I struggled with that idea as well for a short time and then I was reminded of Gods grace. I think all of us will experience a dark time, whether that be a death in the family, infidelity, a job loss, a breakup, a bad report, parenting oops, etc, and we will all be confronted with Gods grace – it is just whether we choose to accept it or not. And not going to lie, I know a lot of people that refuse the help. I did for a while. It made every boulder feel like a mountain. But with Gods grace it now makes every boulder feel like a stepping stone in the right direction. And for that I am forever grateful.